Yesterday was one of the best days that I’ve had in a very long time. It was really one of the most perfect days ever where I felt so happy to the point of crying tears of joy. I had gone to my doctor’s appointment for a follow up and to get my results from recent blood work that I had done. To sum it up, my results were great and my health is improving. I was so thrilled since I’ve been working really hard on my health, even though I had fallen off the path due to traveling. Prior to my doctor’s appointment I was terrified and stressed out for what the outcome of my results will be. I had gotten frustrated at one point because I had to go back twice to get blood work done. I get it that mistakes happen, but I was just so angry. I was just sick and tired of getting jabbed with a needle just to get my blood and it reminded me of when I was back in the hospital, being hooked up to an IV and getting woken up at 5AM just to get stabbed again for my blood while I’m hardly awake. It was just a painful time for me in the past and at times it still affects me. I’ve gone to temple to pray a lot just for my health as well as other things that I usually pray about to get better. Having to take this medicine before I turn 30 is overwhelming. Anyways, I’m happy with my recent results and hope to continue getting better and hopefully be medicine free.
Work has improved a lot. My new boss has continued to be nothing but so supportive of me. I’ve been missing that for awhile at this job and it’s just so uplifting and rewarding. A couple weeks ago he had sent me an email to reassure me that I am not forgotten since things had gotten a bit quiet once I returned from my work trip. Last week he called me up to vent about some of the stuff that’s on his plate and was asking for help. He didn’t want me to do the work if I didn’t feel like it, but I offered any support that I can in return to help him out. Pretty much I have to be a hard ass and get in front of certain folks to do their job. He had sent out an introduction email to the folks that I will have to connect with, a couple I’ve chatted with before but never met in person. The one guy that I’ve worked with before happened to be in town so we scheduled a whiteboarding session. It was nice to finally put a face to the name finally. After our quick session, he pulled me into this other meeting that he was in where they would need my input. I got thrown into a meeting full of execs and I thought “ugh, w-t-f…”. One of the execs knows me and he’s a nice guy so I sat next to him as I was trying to catch up on their discussion. I sat there observing and listening and didn’t chime in that much, but I guess my few words that I did say had made a large impact on some folks. I had to be pretty firm and tell one guy that I’m not doing any design work until he writes up this document for me and I went into a straight forward explanation that if he doesn’t do it, then he sets us all back from doing our jobs and whatnot. I had gone into further explanation with this project manager about the importance of this document while the others took a quick break. At the end we all shook hands and parted ways. I was so happy to get out of that room and so happy that I had plans to grab a beer with my coworker.
The next morning while still in bed and still trying to open my eyes, I woke up to a message from my boss: “Don’t take this the wrong way but I LOVE your style you presented yesterday!!!!!! Giuliana told me how you performed. PERFECT!”. I had a huge smile on my face and just kept staring at that message before I replied. I really felt like I didn’t do much besides just being very blunt and listening. I simply told my boss that I was just doing my job and he thanked me again. It just made me feel more empowered at my job and in that moment where I said ‘no’ to that one exec that I’m not doing anything until he gives me what I want was pretty awesome. For a long time you always have to be practically the ‘yes man’ and it was refreshing to simply say ‘no’ for once. I also felt like another reason what he said about ‘my style’ is in regards to when he first met me during my visit, and we had a meeting with our team, I was REALLY blunt about everything haha. Probably too blunt but whatever. I basically said “the process needs to change and everyone wants change but no ones doing shit but continuing to build some embarrassing bullshit so stop acting like yall know what the fuck you’re talking about” lol. There was a lot more said, but yeah those words came out of my mouth and I have no shame to speak like that at work. I didn’t say anything wrong and I wanted to snap these fools out of this ugly mess.
With the good things happening at work and with my health all in that one day, I truly felt so much love and that I was surrounded by so much of it. It was so comforting and I was so happy. I haven’t felt such true bliss in a long time. The past 2 years has been so challenging for me and it was just so nice to have this one ultimately amazing day that I will never forget. I am forever grateful for my supportive parents and friends that has guided me along the way. Thinking about them, the obstacles that I’ve been challenged with and the progress that I’ve made me I feel so happy and loved to the point where I was overwhelmed and wanted to cry tears of joy. I feel good about life again and only for things to continue moving onward and upward.