I’m dealing with some scary stuff right now and it’s been extremely stressful the past couple of days. It’s been hard to sleep since I am just beyond scared and upset. Basically my left leg isn’t functioning properly. It feels very weak, numb and it tingles and my knee is stiff, but I’m still able to walk around a bit. As for driving, my left leg gets uncomfortable for sitting in the car for too long. I noticed all of this on Sunday morning. I had worn heels the night before since I had a wedding to attend and the next morning I noticed my left leg felt weird. I was planning on going to the gym that morning, but opted for a walk around the neighborhood to see how I feel. I walked it off a bit and decided maybe I should see what would happen if I tried to lightly jog. Major mistake. I fell and scrapped my knee. Not the brightest idea. I had walked back home and tried to use my left foot first to step into my place since there’s a small step. Yeah, I fell AGAIN. I panicked really bad and got really scared.
Pretty sure it’s sciatica from all the symptoms that I have. I felt so immobile yesterday and it sucked. I was too scared to get up and do anything in case I might fall again and no one is around. That idea alone made me feel extremely unhappy. This is the down side of living somewhere where you don’t have your family or friends around. If I was back in Boston, I’d have plenty of help. But what’s the use of an emergency contact when they live across the country? My parents called me last night and I always try to not worry them about anything, but this case I had to let them know what was wrong. Of course they became extremely concerned and I felt horrible for having them know what was wrong, but this is something I can’t hide.
There’s complications with my health insurance which a major blocker, otherwise I would’ve seen the doctor already and not even be writing about this. But I feel extremely helpless and alone dealing with this. It’s hard not for me to cry as much as I am about it because I really have no one to turn to. Luckily I’ve gotten the health insurance issue straightened out, but I still have to wait 2 weeks. I really miss my family and friends and times like this I highly consider moving back. It really scares me that what if something else happens and no one can come help me. I’m just extremely upset and I’m really hoping that I get better. Luckily with my job I am able to work remotely, but still I prefer to be in the office. I went to get a massage today in hopes that it might relieve the pain which it temporarily did. Next step is hopefully I can go to this doctor that my landlord recommends for acupuncture.
I’m just extremely scared to fall asleep and to wake up the next day to my left leg being totally impaired.