Beyond Burnt Out

I’m officially burnt the fuck out. It’s great that I’m busy with work, but I’m extremely exhausted. The combination of my commute and staying late at the office is hitting me hard. This past month I’ve been staying at the office until 7-8PM. The other night I was at the office until 9PM and didn’t get home until 10AM…only to wake up at 6AM. I remember when I got home it was so hard for me to keep my eyes opened, but I forced myself to shower and head to bed. I’ve been skipping dinner, which is no bueno. The thought of having to hold a utensil to feed myself makes me feel tired enough as is. It’s a horrible habit. I would continue doing my work right now, but I’m forcing myself to take a break and to save it for tomorrow. I haven’t been replying to e-mails as promptly as I used to. I let one e-mail that I glimpsed at sit in my inbox for a couple of days only to realize my friend mentioned that she’ll be moving to South Africa the day I arrive back to Boston. WAKE UP!!! Clearly my tired eyes over looked that part of the already brief e-mail. I’ve been trying to catch up with friends the past two days. I’m just really tired. It was hard for my to really concentrate on my work today since I generally work from home on Fridays. Working from home isn’t the issue. I was just getting frustrated seeing the work load that I needed to clear off my plate. I forced myself to get out and to go to a cafe. I almost a break down borderline happening if I didn’t leave the house. Before I got into my car to go, I checked the mail and received a pleasant surprise. I got a little package from my friend in CT. She sent some makeup, a card and her baby shower invite. It was a really sweet gesture and was a great pick me up since I was borderline close to losing my shit lol. It made me feel a bit better and I continued on my way to the cafe.

My boss recently purchased some nice leather couches and an epic jaguar coffee table for our work space. I’ve been sitting on the couch during the evening to do work. But even more recently we’ve moved the couch to this one corner in our work space, which has now become a power nap area. My colleague and I both had naps in mind so we both took a nap on the couches while my boss played us Led Zeppelin lullabies on Spotify haha. It was actually quite relaxing. I am so glad we got those couches. Sometimes I just want to lay down and rest my eyes. My eyes spend a lot of time either staring at my laptop screen along with a big monitor at work or on the road. I feel like my eyes are getting dry and strained.

Starting to think I’m catching up a minor cold since I’m not getting enough rest, which I definitely cannot allow to happen right now. Hoping to crank out all of my work by end of day tomorrow so I can make up for the amount of sleep I’ve been deprived of. Right now I’m trying to figure out where to go for vacation. At this point it’s much needed. I need to disconnect from my work and laptop. I just want to relax, enjoy yummy food and do nothing but just chill. As for where I want to go, I’m not too sure. I don’t have a beach resort in mind since that’s not really my thing. I’ll figure something out. In the meantime, I really need to handle this work-life balance situation.

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