Running…Again

A couple years ago I started running. I got sick of my gym routine since I was being cautious of my bad knee. I had injured my knee from when I used to play field hockey in middle school. If I ran for 10 minutes my knee would hurt and I’d be limping. It sucked. One day I just said fuck it and hopped on the treadmill. I went from dragging my ass to get in at least a mile to running 3 miles at ease. I remember how great I felt. It was a phase where a few of my friends had started to get into running and were signing up for 5K’s and whatnot. I was excited to join them and to accomplish one…until I really fucked up my ankle and sprained it really bad. That injury still makes me really frustrated. I haven’t really tried to run ever since that incident. I went through this phase where I was extremely mad at myself, embarrassed, and unhappy. I understand that shit happens and accidents do occur, but somewhere in my mind I felt like I could’ve been more cautious to have prevented it. When I did try to run again, my ankle felt like shit because it didn’t heal properly. This caused me to be even more frustrated with myself. Back onto the damn bicycle I went. I got into cycling for a bit. I was cycling 12-15 miles 4-6 times a week. As much as I enjoyed it, I didn’t get the same feeling as I did when I ran.

One of my close girlfriends who was never a runner has been a big inspiration to me. I’ve seen her dread the thought of running even a mile to doing half marathons and now preparing to run the Boston Marathon. I respect her (and all the other participants) a lot for doing that run since it’s a really tough marathon. 26.2 miles makes me cringe. At most I can fathom the thought of doing 6 miles. Her and I have been trying to motivate each other as she’s training for this marathon and I’m trying to get fit in general as well as to get in shape for my other close friend’s wedding in a few months. I’ve noticed how much stress was really affecting my health. Trust me, it’s not a good look and I felt like shit. I feel as though I’ve grown suddenly self conscious of my body and I really shouldn’t. Besides the unnecessary and negative emotions, it’s nice to be a part of this “journey” with my close friend where we can motivate each other.

Since work has somewhat quieted down or more like me trying to get a better grip of my schedule, I started running again. I only started as of last night so I can’t really say too much except I’m glad I did it. I was originally gonna get a quick workout in at the gym, which I kinda did. Instead I just tossed my ass onto the treadmill and started doing some interval training since it was my first day doing this “running thing” again. When I was done I felt really good about myself. It’s kinda hard to describe, but I’m glad I did it. Tonight will be day 2 and who knows how long this will last. “They” say it takes 21 days to form a habit so we shall see. I know I have an upcoming trip that might fuck this up as I’m trying to discipline myself, but it’s okay. I need to relax and to enjoy myself as well.

For now, I’m good. 🙂

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