Maroon 5 – Love Somebody
With all the alone (and free) time I’ve had on my hands, I think a lot about my past relationships. I haven’t had the healthiest relationships nor have I dated the greatest guys ever. They all treated me like shit, but I allowed it so I’m partially at fault, too. When it comes down to the end of the day and no matter how productive I try to keep myself, I find myself laying in bed thinking about how much I miss having a boyfriend. Well more like what it’d be like to be in a healthy relationship. I’m a hopeless romantic at heart haha. I’ve said to a couple of friends about this before that I feel like I’ve forgotten what it’s like to be in a relationship. I’ve done my fair share of dating and meeting guys after a long term relationship, but it never went towards the next step of being monogamous. I’ve met a couple guys here since I’ve moved but we’re just friends and nothing more. They’re cool, but I instantly categorized them in the friend zone lol. Not my fault or theirs, it just happens to be like that. I’m a bit jaded and guarded.
Although a relationship isn’t a priority of mines at the moment, it doesn’t hurt to think about it. I think a lot of it has to do with the loneliness here without my family and friends here with me haha. Maybe once I’m in a much more stable place in my life I’ll feel more comfortable dating again. As for now due to a couple of other reasons that will remain disclosed, I’m just emotionally unavailable at the moment. Not trying to sound cocky or anything, but I know I’m a great woman and I have a lot to offer any man. I just have horrible luck when it comes to men. Over the years, I’ve dated different types of men. So if you ask me what’s my type, I really don’t have one. Come as you are and don’t bullshit me because if you do I’m gonna call you out on it. It’s simple as that. I’ve kept my options opened and I’ve been very open minded about men. I generally don’t ask for too much. I know what I want and I have reasonable needs, yet no one has been able to fulfill any of my needs. As I’ve gotten older, it’s gotten harder for me to be interested in someone. Once I’m interested, it’s harder to keep me interested. Perhaps I’ve gotten too picky for my own good, but I don’t think so.
Anyways, like I said before, a little daydreaming doesn’t hurt haha. One day I’ll meet that stud McMuffin haha. :p