I’ve come to realize that I’m a pretty fucked up person. Today, I heard some news about a family member and my reaction to the information clearly isn’t like how most people should react to it, especially if it’s regarding family. Most would be devastated and upset, but I just don’t really give a fuck and for what reason? I’ve given up on those relatives a long time ago and I consider them to be strangers. I’ve just always seen them as strangers and not just categorize them as “distant” family members. Unfortunately blood doesn’t really mean much to me anymore besides my parents and a few relatives. I consider them to be my true blood. I could careless for the rest. My definition of blood has changed as I’ve gotten older. I’ve checked out so long ago and I really can’t empathize for this person or any of them what so ever. I’m not wishing them any harm or saying they deserve it but seriously, I just don’t care. I don’t feel bad about feeling this way either. I’m sure if I was in the same predicament they could give a fuck.
I guess when it comes to certain people and situations I can be a stubborn, cold hearted bitch. Nothing to be proud of, but it’s just how I am. My loyalty and respect lies with those that deserves it the most.